Hi All
Very busy week this week - work, courses from work, another bout of parental illness, and a day off spent (for various) reasons going backwards and forwards either to Aldenham and Watford.
And 'backwards & forwards' could be best used to describe my current dieting status - appalling could be another description, if not entirely pathetic.
My only really difficult meal was Thursday lunch at the course as it was a buffet & the veggie food was either sandwiches, fried stuff (onion bhajiis, spring rolls, sweetcorn patties), very mayonnaisey coleslaw, a very nice cheese board with biscuits & a salad of lettuce & sliced onions. The coffee was good tho as was the facilitation skills training & the only saving grace was that after lunch it got taken away very quickly so no opportunity for grazing................except on mini-muffins which they did leave.
A few months ago I'd have had two sandwich triangles and the lettuce with lots of water/coffee and on my way home stopped to buy some fruit/smoked salmon etc to munch in the car - as I'm sure you can tell that's not what happened on Thursday. Before then I hadn't been great either - after my better start on Monday, I had chocolate bars on Tuesday & Wednesday.
I'm so irritated with myself and feel like surrendering - don't worry I'm not going to.............well not yet anyway. But I do wish I knew which rogue brain cells I need to zap to get my 'I'm following the SW way of eating' brain cells to take control.
I was very good yesterday & today - only sins yesterday was the skin on my roast chicken last night. Today I've had no sins, drank loads, had plenty of fresh fruit and veg and minimised the protein.
I'm treating Andrew to Star Wars Episode 1 in 3D tonight at Westfield - so we will go out to eat first & I'll be very careful what I choose.
Tomorrow I'm definitely going to the gym (couldn't go Friday as I took a friend for a hospital appointment) and then we are meeting Andrew's parents for lunch at the cafe in Pinner Park - oh joy!!!!!!!!!!!
My real frustration (don't worry it's not that kind of blog!) is that I'm really in control Friday to Monday & really pathetically out of control Tuesday - Thursday & that means I'm stabilising at best, gradually going up at worst. I know I wanted to be slimmer and I'm realistic about the time it might take but why oh why do I self-sabotage??????
Answers on a postcard...........
Lxx
Lisa - I'm at the same point, so know where you're coming from exactly! I've actually put on 5lbs if it makes you feel any better. I haven't walked for weeks or managed Zumba due to a chest infection and am feeling so yucky and fat I can't tell you! It's very difficult when we are at work, or at the shops, and all that lovely food is just there staring at us, wanting us to eat it! The only glimmer of hope I can offer is that when the weather improves then so will we. We know we want to be sexy and slim for the summer and we WILL do it - we just need to get back in the "zone", which is just around the corner, I can feel it. Don't worry - at least you are aware of what you're eating which is better than not caring at all. Keep your pecker up and don't beat yourself up about it. Xxx
ReplyDelete